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March 07 Day 67Well, I was able to push Dad into getting "a" picture with Stacey and Me. He was in quite a bit of pain yesterday so he was understandably grumpy. Stacey said she will blog the info we recieved from the oncologist. Her being a RN makes it easier to explain. We recieved our New Shirts also and had some pics of them too. I posted updated pics of us and all the pics. from yesterday in our albums. I'm a bit down and worn out from yesterday so I will blog more tomorrow with a livelier attitude.
Have a Great Day 67! March 05 BACK ON TRACK TO THE FINISH LINE:O)Hey Wendy,
Iv'e got the fight back in me  It's time to stop feeling sorry for myself and get on with it. I have succeeded in making it 3 days of sticking to the plan. We have nothing to complain about especially when dad has been given a life sentence. Lets create some positive energy and make progress so when times get rougher, we will have more strength. We are the strong ones of the family and he is going to need us like never before. Lets make him proud and keep a smile on his face. While watching "Biggest Loser" last night, I so wished we could get the opportunity to be on that show. They work so hard and they are real people like us. We can feel their pain and it is so inspiring. Why aren't there more people out there like Jillian and Bob who are willing to help when people need it the most. It's like the lottery, and people who are millionaires - why can't they share and put a smile on many peoples faces instead of just one. Why can't 240 million people win one million each? Make the lottery a million dollar prize no matter what- more people would buy and certainly more people would be happier. People helping people!! What a great thing to do. I can't imagine the personal reward Jillian and Bob get, to see the contestants be so successful. They are great teachers! Lets go out with a bang and do this!! TTFN OAO GB It's Day 65!Well, a new day has come and I can say with honesty....I worked out the best ever today! Woooooh Hooooooh for MEEEE! I walked on the treadmill for 18 min.(longest ever!) doing a programed workout (with weights in each hand) THEN ... I used my new "STAYBALL by GoldsGym" . I worked on my "APRON" area the most. I'm tired of it "hangin" ~ Along with this awesome workout ~ I sanded a 5' long x 3' wide x 4' high dresser (made of oak ... by my husband Rick  ) and then coated it with clear-coat. THEN... I changed my bedroom around to fit in the new dresser. I have been a busy little bee today and it feels awesome! I want to say I did all this for the right reasons ... but ... dads oncology appt. is tomorrow and I have been trying not to think about it. Stacey will be up here tonight to be at the appt. with dad and I, so maybe we will get some new pics for all to see. Like us With Dad :>) It depends on dads mood. If all is not GRIM on day 66, we will blog the news. Have a GREAT remainder 65!March 04 Don't Delay TodayGood Morning All. It's day 64 and counting. I can honestly say that I haven't given it my "all ". It makes me sick to think of it that way too. How many days have I waisted feeling sorry for myself? I have nothing to whine about! My dad has lung cancer, can't do a thing about it and he's not whining! At least I can do something about my desease! So, here is my plea.... I will take this one day at a time. I will get through today and when I succeed today, I will mark off day 64. I'm not looking at tomorrow until it's today. Tomorrow never comes so why think about it?! Every day is our " Last Chance " work out day because Tomorrow Never Comes. I am not going to put off anything anymore. If I have learned one thing in the past 64 days , it's that. So......you all have a Successful Day....I will see you on Day 65! ( I'm going to work out ! ) March 02 IT'S JUST THE BEGINNING!!!Now that Wendy is done venting, it is my turn. This was suppose to be a scrap-booking weekend and spend the day with our dad. Well, I went to bed early so I didn't get much scrapping done, and didn't get up until 11:30a.m. so we didn't go see dad. We finally decided to take some progress pictures and some measurements. That was depressing!! I'm not sure why, but food becomes the focus of my day. I think it does Wendy's too. What makes me think about food more than anything else? We are both depressed now and it seems we have done this for nothing. Dads appt with the Oncologist is Thursday. We will be focusing on keeping him healthy and not letting him give up. It seems we can always help other people with their issues such as reaching their goals-staying motivated-and when it comes to our own issues... we fail. As Wendy said, we can multi - task but it really never benefits our well being. Can someone tell me why we can't do this? We both are very hard workers. We always give 110% at work and never take shortcuts. Why do we continue to work half as hard at making ourselves healthy??? I think we need to go to the Biggest Loser Ranch and they will set us both straight!!! I am not giving up. This is just the beginning of our life long journey. It is in our genes to be heavy and we just need to work a little harder and longer to be healthy. Most of the pictures on our site have been taken by Wendy. If you could see some of her work, it would amaze you. I am so thankful to have her as my sister/photographer. We both have many talents but losing weight is not one of them. I couldn't be a photographer, I'm sure Wendy would not want to be a nurse, and neither one of us is real good at managing to lose weight. I can promise that our journey will continue long after this contest, win or lose. Good luck to everyone!! IT'S NOT OVER YETWell fellow BL/MSN friends, we are almost to the deadline of this portion of our journeys. We have just 9 days befor we have to submit our site to show what our journey has done for us. Me, for one, I am not happy with myself ( or Stacey for that matter ). We are strong women with alot of great things in our life and we just can't seem to get a handle on this weight issue. What are we thinking.? We can't use every obstical (big or small) as and excuse! Yes, our Dad is a very big concern and focus right now. However, so is our weight. We are WOMEN.... WE CAN MULTI-TASK ! Stacey is here for the weekend again, not to have us work together, but to go scrap-booking again. After that, we were suppose to take progress pics - do another video - measure one another - set new goals - and blog. Well, we managed to eat unhealthy and not follow our plan. We are both so discusted with our actions and don't know where we go from here. Stacey says, "At least we lost" - Rick says " At least when you start again tomorrow, you will be starting at a smaller weight" They are both right, however, it doesn't hide the fact that we are still allowing the same demons to creep in and take over our lives. How do we stop this cycle? Are we ever going to win a battle where the demons we are up against are the very same demons we need to survive.? I'm not up to weighing in tomorrow. I don't think I can handle the pain of the scale at this point. I believe it would just drive me further down the path of self - destruction. I will however, stay on track as best as I can and weigh in next Monday with - hopefully - a better attitude and outlook on my battle. Good Luck to all of our friends, we hope your demons have been put to rest. February 29 I AM BACK!I just had a POWER chat with myself. I allowed myself time to fall off the wagon and told myself it's time to GET A GRIP. I got up this morn at 6 am (as every other day), sent Rick and the Kids on their way, put on my work-out duds and began my day with a 40 min. work-out. I feel GREAT ! Motivated ! Energized !..... Our dad won't see me as a quiter. He will be here long enough to see ME as a "BIGGEST LOSER"! He will see the anger about his desease put into an energy of determination. A determination to beat my desease and show him he can be proud of his baby girl! Are you with me Stac? Get your butt up here tonight so I can give you the POWER chat too. We WILL Win Our Battle! February 28 In My E-Mail...Stac, this was an e-mail I got today. Our friends and family are really feeling our pain too. Let's keep showing everyone how strong our Dad taught us to be... :>)
I want you to know that your Dad and your entire family are in my daily thoughts and prayers. I went to your site last night and saw the beautiful pics of your dad. He is a handsome man and appears very blessed with a wonderful family such as yours:) Shortly after visiting your site my Aunt Diane sent me an email about her discovery of new lesions in her lung. I HATE THIS DEVASTING DISEASE...IT HAS NO RIGHT TO TAKE THE ONES WE LOVE AND ADORE!!
I am sorry I wasn't more comforting to you over the weekend. I guess I didn't see the real picture and I AM SORRY. THINKING OF YOU TODAY - A FRIEND. February 27 Thanks Sister!Apparently.....I need you (and everyone else) more then I would like to admit! When I read the comments and then your blog, I was so sad and hanging my head. I know the words are genuine but it is so hard to care at this point. Then you called. Girlfriend! You can be CRUEL! But IT WORKED! Yelling at me, telling me I needed cheese with my wine ... etc. was what I needed to hear. You are sooo right, Dad needs us. I have been reading through our BL/MSN friends sites today for inspiration and while back on our site, our second song was playing ( I am Changing ) ... I noticed "Dads" album was running through it's cycle. The words just grabbed me and hit me like a ton of bricks! "I NEED YOU, I NEED A HELPING HAND" Those words really are working full circle. Dad needs us for strength and I need dads strength to stay strong. Do you understand what I mean.....I'm not sure I'm explaining myself correctly. I went and watched dad bowl last night instead of watching BL. He is in better spirits and has a very positive attitude. He even joked about his "BUCKET LIST"! He wants to roll a 300 game in bowling, f*#> Marilyn Manroe, and hit a whole in one at golf! Well, Jack and I told him that they are all next to, or deffinately IMPOSSIBLE! We laughed and told him maybe we could switch out Marilyn for BLONDIE and that could be his "whole in one"! LOL Anyhow, Thank you fellow BL friends and Seetah...I am NOT giving up. I will get back into this! Dad will be proud of me and ... so will I. February 26 DON'T GIVE UPWell Wendy, I think we should continue to do what we are doing. I am finally out of my eating rampage and had a decent day today. Who ever said life was fair! I told Jeff he should take my debit card away - then I for sure won't go out for lunch. We have to stay busy - take the advice of our Biggest Loser friends. Thank you all for your comments - they really do mean a lot. I am soooo angry right now. We have to turn our anger into energy. One day at a time is all we can do. We need to have a plan every day so we don't end up being so depressed. I don't know what I would do if I didn't go to work everyday. It's easy to get distracted, and I find myself just staring wondering what's next. Living so far apart really sucks too. Biggest loser tonight was a real tear jerker. Jay saying goodbye to his brother Mark had me just bawling. I wish we could take dad away on a 2 month trip to golf and gamble, and to watch boxing of course. Why is it our parents give so much to us and by the time they can really enjoy the "empty nest", it gets taken away by a monster. I hope you can convince dad to be in Saginaw this weekend. We cannot let him spend anymore weekends by himself. He needs us more than Biggest Loser does. So far America has lost close to 500,000 pounds. To think we are part of that number - small things do make a difference Lets just take tiny steps and not look into the future. We can do it - with the help of each other, our families, our children, and dad. I think we are finally realizing the outcome of this news, and I also find myself tearing up. We just need a family outing so we can all laugh and cry together. Did I tell you LIFE SUCKS!! Only the good die young WHAT'S NEXTI am so out of it! All I do is tear up and think of the fast aproaching loss... dad.  I ate everything in sight yesterday! Cereal for breakfast, 2 cans of mountain dew, 1 can of prego light soup, 2 apples. Sounds good ... right? THEN..... without even thinking, I ate ONE donut and then another...which led to another and EVEN ONE MORE! After that, I ate about 3 servings of peanut M&Ms. I felt soooo sick after all of that and it was only 2pm.! I was so discusted with myself that I felt like heading to the toilet to try bulimia! I didn't. I just suffered the rest of the day and ate NOTHING else. I was so upset with myself when you called that I lied to you about having a customer on the phone and not being able to talk. I didn't want you to be able to figure it all out. I went to bed at 9:30 and cried myself to sleep. That was after Rick had worked for 13hrs (7am - 8pm) and I didn't even have dinner for him or the kids. What a terrible parent and wife! Rick began to cook dinner at 9:15 for him and the boys so I went to bed. It is so hard to be strong as everyone says to do. It's your turn Stac, you need to hold me up. Apparently, it's my turn to crash....and boy am I crashingFebruary 24 A HORRIBLE WEEKEND!So Stac, Rick and I went on our planned weekend away with our friends. After learning the news about Dad ... I really didn't feel up to a "fun" weekend. I tried not to think the worst thoughts but it was not easy. All I could think was that I was being selfish having fun and not spending time with Dad. I know you told me that I should go but it still made me feel soo guilty. Any time I saw an older man, my eyes would well up. I can't imagine life without him. He is such a goof-ball! I was talking to Janel and Jessie on Friday before we left and they were remembering Dad when he told that joke. He was hillarious! Well, the more I tried not to think about Dad, the more all the conversations led to him. There was no work-out room at this particular hotel so I tried to do water aerobics in the pool. I wasn't very good at it so I did a few laps each day. I still tried to eat right but I have to be honest, I did not succeed. I am so mad at myself! What good am I going to be to Dad when he needs me most? He is really proud of how far we have come and I really don't want him to be disappointed in me. I really dread the weigh in tomorrow morn. but I promise I will tell you the truth. You had also not fib either! This is a pretty big bump in our road, Remember, WE DIDN'T START THIS TO WIN A CONTEST! We are doing this for all the right reasons. Changing our lives is NOT a diet that will be poundage coming back....it is getting rid of all the extra "baggage" in our lives - for good.! This horrible nightmare with Dad is just beginning, but we can still change our lives; it just may take us a bit longer then the rest of the couples. It's all about the end result and the lessons we learn on this journey, not the time it takes us to get there. Our time with Dad is most important and our weight issues are second in line. They are not being put on the back burner, we just have to "multi-task" when ever we can to accomplish both goals. February 21 OUR TOUGHEST BATTLEHey Wendy,
I think I am still in shock from the news yesterday. I don't know what to say or do. We need to spend as much time with dad as possible. Once he sees the oncologist, I will decide when to take some time off. How was your day? I just feel so down about everything. Misty said she tried to call you today. I hope you can enjoy your weekend away. I don't know what to do this weekend. Jeff will be home Saturday around 5pm. He will be golfing tomorrow - sounds like work to me. I would like to take dad golfing somewhere nice for a couple of weeks. He needs to get out and enjoy himself. This winter has been tough on everyone, it's like cabin fever. Your new dresser looks awesome!! Call me if you find out when dads appt is. I have no service with my cell phone for some reason so that's why I haven't called you. Lets take this one day at a time and spend some memorable and cherishable times - he is an Emeott after all - maybe he will live to be 92. Lets get him some tweezers and a grandma shirt with pockets to keep his hanky and money. Love you lots sis!! Thanks for all you have done!! NEWS ON DAD ... :O(Well , you may have guessed. The news was not good. The test showed that Dad not only has 2 spots in his right lung, he has 3. That would not be so bad and would make him a surgical candidate. However, he also has a small spot outside of his right lung that is in a lymphnode (sp). This makes him automatically a stage 3B cancer patient. We don't know where we go from here. Dad has to see an oncologist asap to tell us his expectancies and get him into kemo. and radiation therapy. We all are taking this very hard as you would expect. I am trying to not focus on the bad of it all and just trying to stay focused on what I eat. I made Stacey work out on my treadmill yesterday befor we went to the appt. to get her feeling guilty about eating bad. She felt so much better when she was done, she said it will help her get back to business. We plan on taking time off work to spend with Dad, we just don't know any details. I think that will help us stay on track, because Dad is addiment about NOT letting us give up! ...... I just want to say THANK YOU to all of you for your nice words and your many prayers. You all have been so kind and supportive. It makes me stay focused to be able to talk about my Dad and helps me to allow Stacey to lean heavier on me. So again, THANK YOU.  February 19 I'm Bummed ... Not AngryWell, I talked to Stacey last night via phone and she was so quick tempered. The kids were whining, it was cold in her office, she couldn't find the site....bla bla bla ....I am sure she won't be blogging her weigh-in from yesterday morn - if you didn't notice, she gained 5 lbs. It is so easy to stray from the issue at hand when your mind keeps you in the dumps about bigger issues. We all handle things differently. I am totally sure if the news is bad tomorrow, you all won't here from either of us for a bit. I am not sure how long, but I am NOT going to quit this life change! AND- I will NOT let Stacey either. I am not upset with Stac. I totally understand. She also has been extremely tired and thought she had a sinus infection. She went to the doc. and he informed her she has a bacterial infection that is causing all of her problems. YEAH! This means we still have hope! I can't do this without her and tomorrow she is driving up for the results appt. We will lean on each other and figure this all out. Losing a parent is the HARDEST thing ever! Please continue to pray for our Dad and Thank you all for your kind words.February 18 Our "Live" Event .... HELP !!!
"Prepare" for HUNGER!Hey Stac. I just spent some time in the kitchen and desided to make some grab bags of munchie items. When I feel like munching, I usually grab a handful or the container and don't realize how much I am actually eating. I like different kinds of plain cereal so that is what I bagged up, but you could do this too with any item you like as long as you lable the bag and know what you are eating. I put 1 serving size in each bag to get me started in size control.
Do this when the boys go to bed tonight and you can take a couple of bags to work! HAPPY BAGGING! :>)
I ALSO ADDED ANOTHER ALBUM! It's of DAD :>) I thought it would be nice for everyone to put a face with a name. That way our supporters could see the "Funny-Man" we call DAD and who the lung cancer could be taking away from us. I hope his pics bring you great memories and make you laugh like they do me. According to "Womens Health"This site will show you the top 100 foods that are best for a healthy womans body. Check it out. You can make a grocery list and print it out also.
February 17 WORTH THE PAIN ...?Here we are, the bottom of the 6th, with Stacey up to weigh..... Will she do it? Will she hit a single, a double, a triple!! OR.... will she strike out from the cookies she ate!!! Yep, you heard me. I spent the weekend at dad's with her and the rest of the gang for Stacey's youngest son Ethans 3rd birthday. She may say she is out of this funk but I got to see it first hand. We are all having a very difficult time waiting for the results of dad's test but Stacey just can not focus on anything except the fairness of life. Well, stay tuned to the visiual tracking module and find out...WERE THE COOKIES REALLY WORTH IT ! February 14 Welcome Back :>)Hey, Wendy here. I just want to say THANK YOU for all the nice words and prayers from everyone for Stac , Me and our DAD. Your thoughtfulness has helped me in keeping Stacey focused. We are not focused on winning a contest....we just don't need to GIVE UP one more time with weightloss. None of us know what tomorrow will bring and as our dad said..." You're not losing this damn weight for me!" " Why would you do so well and then stop because of ME!" "Get your ass back in this" ..... He is right! There will always be something that we'll allow to discourage us from continueing-Some things will be harder then others-IF WE ALLOW DEFEAT, WE WILL BE DEFEATED! Thank you Stac ... for not giving up. It has shown in the past, I can not do this alone. I really need you Stacey and I am so glad you won't desert our mission
Happy Valentines Day..... BUT... NO CHOCOLATE!! |
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